WHY FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS IS NOT BENEFICIAL
Have you ever met a man you were really attracted too and decided to “take a chance” and become intimate after the second or third date?
Maybe it had been awhile since you had felt that way about someone and it was just too hard to resist.
Or maybe you thought I am a mature adult, I can handle this. So you decided what the heck!
And the sex was good and you felt a real connection. Maybe you even fell in love.
And then after just a few weeks or a few months the relationship stopped progressing. He did not call as much and he stopped making plans. But when you were together, it was so great and he was so sweet. He may still show up every few weeks to “hang out” but you do not have relationship that you were hoping for.
There was so much potential! What happened?
THE UNFORTUNATE TRUTH ABOUT MEN AND WOMEN
Women have sex with men, develop a bond and fall in love hoping it will lead to a commitment.
Men can have sex with a woman without falling in love AND without considering themselves committed.
Not such a great scenario is it?
Here are 5 BIG REASONS why it is important to wait for intimacy!
- Many men can feel strong attraction toward a woman without being in love.
- Even if you are having sex AND not dating other people that does not mean you are in a committed relationship.
- You don’t even start to get to really know someone until you have been dating them for at least 3 months.
- Real intimacy and closeness develops over time through shared experiences, not just sex.
- Having sex too soon and developing a bond too early can result in spending YEARS of your life with the WRONG MAN and without the relationship you want.
Let’s be real, there is nothing like the excitement of feeling chemistry with a man, ESPECIALLY if it has been a long time between relationships.
It can be very tempting to give in to that chemistry and attraction but you owe it to yourself to wait!
Karen was attracted to Greg, a man in her social circle. He had a reputation for being somewhat of a lady’s man. But Karen felt they had a special connection and after just one kiss she already had strong feelings for him. The problem was Greg told her he was not interested in a serious relationship. He was worried he would only “let her down”. When Karen came to us, she was considering having a casual affair because she was so attracted to him.
Karen realized she wanted more than just a casual affair, what she really wanted was to be in loving, fulfilling committed relationship. With great self discipline she firmly established a friendship boundary with him and she began to date other people.
Guess what happened? Greg started asking her out on dates. When she explained that she did not have sex outside of a committed relationship he respected her even more. After dating for several months they fell in love and became a couple. Now, less than a year later they are engaged and planning their wedding!!
Commit to yourself! Do not become intimate without a commitment!
And do not commit without taking the time to get know your potential partner!
Remember- YOU CAN NEVER LOSE ANYTHING WORTH HAVING BY WAITING!